This week we will be considering the body. Your body. My body. I want to look at what Christians teach about the body and what effect that has on exChristians. What does it mean, as exChristians, to listen to our bodies, to consider sexuality in our bodies and what should we think about the future of our bodies?
Christian View of the Body:
Christian teaching says we are created by God. We are made in his image, Gen 2:7. All he created is “good”, and our bodies are fearfully and wonderfully made, Ps 139:13-16.
Our bodies are a holy temple where the Spirit lives, 1 Cor 6:19.
Humans are fallen and cursed by sin. At the fall, women’s pain of childbirth was multiplied, the ground cursed so men toil in pain and deal with thorns and thistles. The body with die and return to dust, Gen 3:16-19. Christians are told that to set the mind on the flesh is death and that creation in bondage waiting for the redemption of our bodies, Rom 8:6-7, 19-23. We learn each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire which leads to death, James 1:13-15. The desires of the flesh are not from the Father but is from the world, I John 2:15-16.
We learn through Scripture that Christ took on human flesh, made us alive and raised us to live with him. The Word became flesh and dwelt among us, John 1:14, 1 John 1:1-3. Just as Christ was raised from the dead, we will be, Col 3:1-4. We now need to put to death the deeds of the body so we will live, Rom 8:13 Our body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, we are not our own, we were bought with a price, so glorify God in your body, 1 Cor 6:19-20. After death we get a new body, a resurrection body. The earthly body is transformed, our spirit/soul goes on to everlasting life with a new body. The body goes from corrupt, to incorrupt, from mortality to immortality, from dishonour to glory, from weakness to power, from natural to spiritual, I Cor 15:35-58.
A few more verses to consider:
Romans 8:13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.
Phil 3:21 He will take our weak mortal bodies and change them into glorious bodies like his own, using the same power with which he will bring everything under his control.
Rom 7:18 For I know that good does not dwell in me, that is, in my flesh.
Cognitive Dissonance
Let’s look for a moment at the cognitive dissonance here.
We have our bodies, made in the image of God, all created ‘good’, fearfully and wonderfully made’, and supposed to glorify God. This is contrasted with this same body being cursed, weak, corrupt, mortal, tempting us, not to be trusted as its desires lead to death. There is a separation between the physical body and the spirit/soul. One bad, one good. The body needs to be transformed to be worthy of heaven, for it is bad. This dissonance was ignored when I was a Christian. My body was bad. My body was created good, but sin made it bad. It is bad on earth but will be good in heaven. God promises healing but a few get lucky on earth and get healing. Most of us wait for heaven. I can’t trust my body. I can trust my spirit because God changed it. God is in me so I am holy, but my body still isn’t changed and it’s desires can’t be trusted.
So here we have the basic teaching on the body. Many Christians struggle with their bodies. They don’t know what to do with the pain, disease, wounds and illnesses that Jesus came and healed for a few. Many are told they are not healed because they don’t have enough faith, or have sin in their lives. Others live with only the hope that they will have perfect bodies in heaven, somehow believing that they are glorifying God by his using their suffering to further his purposes.
The Effects of Christian Teaching About the Body
I want to talk today about three areas of our bodies that affect exChristians. The past teaching that we have believed when we were Christians continues to have an affect on us even after we leave the faith. When we examine these areas, acknowledge them and learn and grow, then we can make positive changes in our thoughts and actions that will lead us to have healthier relationships with our bodies. We will talk about listening to our bodies, our sexuality and our future.
Listening to our Bodies. The term ‘embodied’ means feeling at home in your body, feeling connected to your body in a safe manner and being increasingly able to feel all the sensations of your body, both physical and emotional in this present moment. Lots of very good work is being done on the somatic/psychological connection, or how trauma affects our bodies and how our bodies can be used to help heal the trauma they have experienced. For me it has been important to learn to listen to my body, and to trust my body. As a Christian, I had a difficult time with emotions. Anger was mostly bad, fear was bad, sorrow was not to be overdone, depression, anxiety and stress were all suspect as being sinful or the result of sin in my life. Now I see them differently. They are there to tell me something. These emotions show themselves in my body. They show me what is happening in my life and where changes may be needed. As I learn to listen to my body, I can tell feel that the sensations in my body often precede my mind’s understanding of events. If I feel tension in my shoulders, or a gnawing in my stomach, or increased heart rate, I can then stop and wonder why I am feeling these things. I discovered that watching too much news caused these feelings. I now limit my news, reading headlines occasionally, and only once a day, or less, read news that comes in email form from sources I find less sensational. I can get world, national or city news in this format. I do want to know about world events, but am careful where I learn about them to get fair coverage. My social media reading has been altered to include more good news stories and less traumatizing crap. I don’t tend to unfriend people, but I do silence the ones that trigger or irritate me. I pay attention to my body. When I tense up while going to visit certain people, I ask myself why and whether I should be going. Sometimes it is because I don’t feel safe or understood. I can choose to not go, bring a friend with me or wait to go on a day I feel stronger. The more I pay attention to my body and its needs, the better decisions I make. The learning is a process. I need to unlearn that my body is sinful and untrustworthy and newly learn that my body is me. I must treat my body with respect, gratitude, speak well to it and learn to love it. I don’t need to fear my body or constantly try to separate from it, keeping my soul and spirit as sacred while the body is evil. I can become fully embodied and learn ways to heal my trauma by knowing and using my body. I can find my body to be a safe and beautiful place to be me.
Our Sexuality The Bible/churches teaching on sexual purity and homosexuality has done much damage to many Christians. As exChristians, this continues to be an issue that complicates and adds pain to many lives. Child and adolescent development shows that as we develop, our sexuality shines brighter and brighter. We have more desires as we grow, more feelings and more sexual thoughts and feelings. Many learn their bodies are not as expected. They may be lesbian, gay, asexual, trans, or have other ways of defining their gender or sexuality. This is normal and natural development and is unique to everyone. The church teaches purity culture and would rather have everyone identity as either male or female and have our desires to only be turned on after marriage to a Christian of the opposite sex. But our sexuality does not have an on/off switch and attempts to stifle our identities and our sexual urges lead to repression and problems like sexual disfunction, dissociation, overly risky behaviour, sexual pain and guilt. There is so much shame and guilt over masturbation, pornography, premarital sex, extra-marital sex or exploration, and sexual identities that differ from the prescribed ‘correct’ identities. The right and wrong of some of these needs to be discussed. Are you hurting others or yourself with your actions? Is there consent? Does what is being done fit with your values? Don’t assume all are sin, look at them with a new lens. What should be done about this? Working with a religious trauma therapist is the best choice, but for those who can’t afford or find one can read some amazing and freeing books that help navigate healing. Let me know if you would like some recommendations. Finding someone trustworthy to talk with about all this can help remove the shame and deal with the guilt that remains. We need to learn to know our sexual bodies. Know it is okay to feel and enjoy, learn to communicate, to be safe and cared for, and to learn to find and give pleasure in enjoyable and agreed upon ways. We can be proud of our sexual and gender identities without fear, shame or guilt. We can heal from past sexual trauma.
The future of our bodies. As Christians heaven was promised with a no more tears, pain, mourning, crying or death. We would have new bodies that will be perfect. As exChristians, what are we to believe? Will there be life after death? Will we get new bodies? Honestly, no one knows for sure. Not Christians, or those who believe in reincarnation, or those who believe we cease to exist. We can make our best guesses, and choose to believe in something, but there is no certainty. What we do know is there is a cycle of life. All of creation lives, then dies. We do return to dust. More specifically, our bodies can become fertilizer that helps what comes after us to thrive in life. The good we do, the words we speak, the love we spread also goes on to encourage and strengthen others. The cycle continues. If we choose to live with hatred and cruel lives, that will affect others. Let’s choose good. Let’s trust that our lives matter and our death matters. What happens next leaves me full of curiosity. I look forward to finding out what comes after death and feel some jealousy over those who have already died and now know. If it is that we cease to exist, that will be ok. If it is that we carry on in an evolved state, that would be really cool. If we are reincarnated, I have some hopes. If I am wrong and there is a Christian God and heaven and hell, then…well, if there is a God who is love, then I am not worried. Whatever happens happens. For now, let’s live our lives fully in our amazing bodies finding peace, joy, and pleasure along with dealing well with pain and struggles.
Thanks for joining me in this discussion of our bodies. May you find a place in your body that is a healthy home for you.
With love,
Val Martens
May 17, 2024
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